In response to blog entry #4, I am exercising my public
voice on a very personal issue. Recently I had the rare privilege of sitting
down in a quiet, childless house and realized I could watch a movie! And not just
any movie but a movie of my choosing! It did not have to be rated Y7 or involve
animation. I browsed Netflix and finally came across the documentary section
and found The Business of Being Born.
This particular offering is directed Abby Epstein and
focuses on America’s drifting away from natural child-birthing practices to
hospital births within the last century. There are interviews with nurses and midwives
and footage of women giving birth, many in bathtubs or portable hot tubs, in
their own homes (talk show host Ricki Lake happens to be one of the women).
There is some brutal photography and footage of what childbirth was like for
some in the 40’s and 50’s (being strapped down and drugged with hallucinogens)
and lots of talk how the obstetrics profession has over stepped its bounds…and
now here comes my voice on this
subject. Women, please, please, please educate and know your boundaries and
preferences before being badgered into a decision by any one on either side of
this debate!
I can speak on this topic as a bit of an expert. I have
given birth three times and have taken both the traditional hospital route as
well as the midwife route and by time number three, knew myself well enough to
know that the no drug, natural, relaxing way to give birth did not work well with
my generally spastic nature. My first child, delivered at 9lbs, 14oz, with the
blessing of an epidural, came into a softly lit birthing suite. There was no
tying me down or terribly invasive medical intervention but I knew that if
something did happen to go wrong I was in the best possible place for me
(physically and psychologically) and my baby. My second child was delivered by a midwife
sans drugs, the ‘natural way”. Not only did I stumble upon my own
interpretation of the Johnny Cash song Burning
Ring of Fire but also that having someone rubbing me and telling me to “breathe”
while suggesting I get on all fours over a beach ball to help the baby drop (What!
I have a beach ball in my belly! How am I going to perform this circus act!? How about we shoot me out of a canon at the same time!)
did not help me get in touch with myself or the birthing experience. It
stressed me out. Time number three I was back at the OBGYN at 8 weeks making
sure they knew I wanted to book the birthing suite and have an epidural
cocktail waiting.
The Business of Being
Born is a very insightful movie (here is a YouTube link to the entire documentary) and I applaud and even envy the women
featured in it who are able to breathe deeply and serenely, half clothed in a tub,
surrounded by friends, family and midwife during their labor experience but I
just know myself better and encourage all future mothers to really do some
introspection to find out the same. Do not let women like Ricki Lake and Abby
Epstein make you feel guilty for choosing medical obstetric care over midwifery
and vice versa. If you feel that your obstetrician is pushing too hard for
medical care you are not comfortable with, seek a second opinion. The first step to take is simply to educate
yourself and ask questions; after all it is your body and your baby.
I think this is a really interesting topic for many reasons. Last semester I had a gal in my group that was a midwife and has help hundreds of people to have babies. She gave all the pro and cons of having the baby in both ways down to cost and pain. It was a real education for me since I didn't know about these options or if people still delivered that way. I agree that women and future mothers need to be educated on what is available to them and what are the benefits without having a bias opinion.
ReplyDeleteThis post made me laugh! I applaud you for telling women to not give in to Peer Pressure or Trends! Do what is comfortable and right for you and your baby. Their entry to the world is traumatic enough they don't need to be introduced to their parents when they are stressed out or scared. Education is definitely the key but my advice is Do Not talk to a new Mom. Talk to a Mom that has had multiple children or gave birth at least two years ago. They can look back on that time with honesty by then and have put away their rose colored glasses for then their kid start playing sports like a pro at the age of 5. I have a son. It wasn't an easy birth, it was painful, I did have drugs and a C-Section or my baby would have died. No I didn't forget the pain, no I didn't think it was beautiful, yes it was a powerful moment, no I didn't want to ever do it again. When you look back on child birth, you should be able to look back and know you did what was the right choice for you and your baby, not for your friends or family.
ReplyDeleteThanks for making me giggle Rachel. The beachball visual was awesome!
Hi Sarah! I appreciate your personal story and how powerful your own experience was. Like you I was much more pleased with the final outcome of birth rather than the experience itself. Thank goodness we can just look forward to grandbabies from here on out!! :)
DeleteYes, the beach ball scene was well...something. It was only topped by me yelling "It's burning!" to which the midwife replied: "What's burning!?" (My best friend leaned over to me and said: "What the hell does she think is burning, your athletes foot?") It was then that the midwife said: "Oh, the baby is crowning." Really??? No, you never forget...